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A Wee Bit Of Clarification On Yesterday’s Noizeletter…

Dear Everybuddy,

To those who haven’t already figured it out… Happy April Fool’s Day yesterday!

I have just been informed that all the stuff I wrote yesterday in my April 1st Noizeletter is false, that the screen test photo was actually a photo of me and a Troy Bolton cardboard cutout I got at Blockbuster for $4.99 (look closely and you can see the cardboard stand behind him), and the song I recorded is actually not going to be used in High School Musical 4. Sorry about that! My bad. I’m really embarrassed about the whole thing. In fact, I have also learned from several sources that the same thing happened last April 1st, when I claimed I had been selected to join The Wiggles. Again my apologies. I just don’t know how I seem to get these things confused. It all seems so real to me.

The truth is, I am apparently not in High School Musical 4. I was auditioning for the inspirational part of the teenage disabled Asian Varsity Football playing girl from a two-mommy home (they were trying to cover all their remaining target demographics that were missing from HSM 1-3 with the addition of one final character), and through some undisclosed form of thinly veiled discrimination, I didn’t get the part. So that was that.

Many of you wisecrackers who remembered last year’s April 1st Noizeletter called my bluff this year. And, of course, many of you beautiful dreamers didn’t. My special love goes to that solid group of you who have now believed my delusionary stories of grandeur two years in a row on April 1st — you know who you are, and I do too, because a lot of you emailed me your congratulations again this year. Your belief in me is stunning, and you should perhaps see a specialist about it. I hope you still love me; I certainly still love you.

For those with XM Radio… You may have heard me on XM Kids Radio yesterday. XM Kids Program Director, Absolutely Mindy, called me live on her nationally broadcast show yesterday to assist me in perpetrating this little hoax to a nationwide audience. People like Mindy do not come around very often; when they do they are generally institutionalized. I love Mindy so much — she is like those legendary DJ’s in the early days of rock radio with an unerring sense of fun who played and said whatever they liked on air. Mindy is planning to play my fake High School Musical 4 track Follow Your Dreams on air a few times in the next week. This is because she is Absolutely Crazy. So listen for it! Her show is great.

As noted last year: Everything I write to you on every day except April 1st each year will be peppered with humor but rooted in truth. But you are all fair game on April 1st. And if you haven’t already, please do go enjoy two minutes of bliss as you listen to my fake High School Musical 4 song Follow Your Dreams — I dare you to find a lyrical or musical concept in this epic song that is not a made-for-TV teen movie cliché. If I may quote the song’s incredibly inspirational climactic lyric:

Don’t have to run,
Don’t have to hide the you that’s blossoming inside…
Just have to follow your dreams.

Now please do excuse me as I go get a tissue to wipe the tear blossoming in my eye….

Cheers and talk to you next month!

Yer buddy for life,

Doctor Noize